...and sleep half the day
when the drugs have gone away
wake up and lazily fill the rest of the day
just to recognize the
pain
and again end up with narcotics in veins
that's the way it goes, decay of former hopes
- decay of life
the sands of
time will make me disappear
thrown up memories make their way through the clouds of my consciousness
the empty spot at the wall
in front of me
makes changes vanish in the sand
and after all makes nothing come undone
run, everyday
reaching goals along
the way,
that others yearn for
there is no real movement but they don't see while going on
until energy is drained, hasty life is
taken towards end
enjoy peace after breakdown, while the traces of pain and scraps of
memories weaken, die away.
another
circle has closed, nightmares of emotional impression fade in
fragile stability.
another day of running away, one of these
beginnings with the end
already known.
another scar, a mark on the way left behind.
another dawn, the sun warming only the
surface.
the empty spot at the wall in front of me
makes changes vanish in the sand
and after all makes nothing come
undone
back in the silence of isolation
the effort's worth a question rather than conviction
all reasons crumble, in a raging
commotion passions turn to dust
as i recognize i am still myself. just myself.